what is enlightenment

[justwannabe]

I posted this on another board I frequent and thought I would share here.

What is enlightenment
enlightenment means you get to sit in very nice chairs, wear very nice clothes, have big ashrams built in your name, have people kiss your feet, charge $600 for a two day retreat, and you also get a big fancy name like babbishricahpamecjajrjeja biehea cheakjkdklb. THen you get to name others, teach them how to heal, how to conduct weekend retreats, teach them how to market, etc... OR MAYBE, enlightemnt means you realize that God does not cost $6.2 quatrillion dollars and that the books should sell for a reasonable price without anyone worshipping your picture, if you choose to write books at all. Or maybe enlightenment is me realizing how judgemental i have been and how judgmental this post is that i am making. or maybe when i am farting i will realize, 'i am here, the time is now, and i am farting, this fart may leave this space but we will always be connected for it is always the part of i am, because i am that, and that is me, even if i am a stinky fart"

Non enlightenment, If I punch you in the eye you may ask "why did you do that" this would be living in the past
enlightenment= I punch you in the eye and you say "my eye feels sore" in this case you are living in the now.
SO
Next time you see someone living in tha past or future, punch them in the eye, then they will become present, if only for a moment. But be careful when trying this technique for they may decide to make you feel the presence of being present as well. Actually dont be careful, because by doing so you are thinking of the future. So go out and put people in the present, you will be an elightened being for it. SO now that I have told you what is enlightenment, next question?

see now you have failed again, you where thinking of the next quesiton werent you. That is not being present, because present has no questions

we are that
signed, Swami yabbadhaboashrieabeoafheoanveuaodvahndandfoburoeug pahlfluguileutoiw hgljboieuthelk

p.s. if you do decide you must ask a next question, I ecpect you to call me by name,if you cannot pronounce it i will not answer your quesiton




*lawyers note, above poster, justwannabe, or bettter NOW, because here and now is what we are, so he is NOW known as Swami yabbadhaboashrieabeoafheoanveuaodvahndandfoburoeug pahlfluguile u toiwhgljboieuthelk was joking in the above post about punching peaple in the eye and should be replaced by a purple nurple (also known as titty twister) for males, or a "Look, I got your nose" for females, and only if you know those people well enough that no criminal action would ensue partaking in such event. Also should be noted that he is in a rambling mood after having an iced Chai soy latte, which may inhibit his silence or inner purifaction, however he will stick to the practice and do his second of twice daily sitting routines in about an hour or so. He has witnessed what the Chai soy latte does and while it tastes really good he chooses not to partake in these a whole lot, because while they are not good or bad, because that would be living in duality and when the veil is lifted we are all united/nonduality. even though the chai soy latte he actually prefers grapes. To the enlgihtened masters, he does not mean to make light of enlightenment, but then enlightenment does have light in it and that is what he is trying to express. He loves the true gurus, and all the world is a guru if seen clearly. He still claims to be love, peace and joy, even if he has had too many chai soy lattes (which for him is one) it is just now that he is acting childish and taking litterally the quote, "come to god as a child" so he hopes god is laughing, cause god is laughter right? His witness is still here, he is just witnessing a state of caffeine/sugar buzz. after cleansing his system by doing multiple pracices, including drinking pee as recomended by the one and only Mr. Yogani, the caffeine and sugar seem to have a little extra kick. If anyone is confused, ask brother carson to sort it out.
thank you and I appreciate you understanding that swami yabbadhaboashrieabeoafheoanveuaodvahndandfoburoeug pahlfluguileutoiwhgljboieuthelk will not be available after the show, i mean lecture, but you can put donations in the Golden vault.

[Pandara]

Ah, Swamiji, very enlightening!

[justwannabe]

Originally Posted by Pandara

Ah, Swamiji, very enlightening!

This is Shri sjfkjsak fjjsfj akljfkljdsafkl sjafdsaf dsugv09sgolakjtkljraklg sajfdfkl jsaklfdsufupds jfjsf sufoidsuf jdsafkljdsfklajs ldsjaoipgus9pauitwajtkljafjpduvpsuagta

i am speaking on behalf of swami yabbadhaboashrieabeoafheoanveuaodvahndandfoburoeug pahlfluguileutoiw hgljboieuthelk


since you did not address swami yabbadhaboashrieabeoafheoanveuaodvahndandfoburoeug pahlfluguileutoiw hgljboieuthelk
by his proper name, you will not recieve any response or blessing from him. To undo this doing by you pandara, you must kiss his picture for 3 hours beginning four hours before sunrise, and then chant his name for hte next hour and then realize he is the sun, for the sun and him are one. Then please send a written statement of your error and a check in the sum of $24278 to the foundation. Please complete your repentence by the next full moon
thank you for your cooperation and understanding of your errors
Shri sjfkjsak fjjsfj akljfkljdsafkl sjafdsaf dsugv09sgolakjtkljraklg sajfdfkl jsaklfdsufupds jfjsf sufoidsuf jdsafkljdsfklajs ldsjaoipgus9pauitwajtkljafjpduvpsuagta

[Pandara]

Namaste Neil,

Jokes aside. Reminds me of my first trip to India when I was confronted by a man walking with another man dressed up like a "swami". Anyway, the assistant came to me, first telling me who his master was (also had one long unprenounceable name and an impressive pedigree as master and guru) and then demanding that I should show respect by prostrating to the "swami". I politely replied that I am a devotee of Swami Sivananda and if he was alive, his feet would be the only feet I would kiss and prostrate to. Then the assistant start to tell me about this dinner party which his master must throw that night and that they need about a 1000 rupees to feed the guests. Again I politely replied that if he was Swami Sivananda of whom I am a devotee I would gladly give him the money, but seeing that he isn't I would contribute 100 rupees, which was honestly all cash I had on me. Well, the "swami" and his assistent left me very disgruntled and I went on about my business. Later at the ashram I told the people about the episode, it turns out the two are well known swindlers prying on Westerners and their ignorance.

When on the spiritual path, east or west or combined, one should be aware of the charlatans they are many.

[justwannabe]

thats a funny story brother, now bow down to the guru within
i am love, i am peace, i am joy
we are one,
brother neil

[Hubert]

While this little episode really cheered me up, I really pretend to know better what enlightment is.

Some people just have the nerve ...

[justwannabe]

Originally Posted by Hubert

While this little episode really cheered me up, I really pretend to know better what enlightment is.

Some people just have the nerve ...

so you were being cheered up/living in the moment, and then you let the mind take control again? you were enlightened but let it fade away
So many definitions of enlightenment, hard to know what it is until we go there I guess
we are love, we are peace, we are joy,
and a part of us is enlightened
brother neil

[Hubert]

The outer aspects of a being do not change because of enlightement. The mind remains the same, just there arises the ability to diregard it completely. Yet disregarding the mind alone does not make one enlighted.
First the "spiritual eyes" have to be prepared, developed, aquired.

These are the chakras opened and revolving. It only takes time, patience, and good awarness for these two things to happen. Life itself is the best school, once one knows the guidelines.

The un-enlighetend person cannot comprehend the sight what is in front of an enlightened one, just as a blind man cannot expereince the sight of a beautiful vista. No explanation can make justice to the expereince of enlightment.

I am not enlighetend, but I made an inch toward it. As when the first light of the sky at dawn brings the hope, and promise of a glorious sunrising, the little I have experienced made my mind accept, and my intelligence and intuition acknowledge the process.

I am not saying this to show off. I just share. I have little, but of that little I am certain, it is a good foundation stone to build on. And just as a pine seed cannot develop into a fully blown tree instantly, the process cannot be manipulated, or artificially accelerated. Just as climbing a stair, it takes every step to be token, because this is the nature of growth. A child cannot lift the weight an adult can. A baby cannot know the joy of having a communion with another body of opposite gender. It simply lacks the right tools, and thes tools need time to develop.

In fact, I say just the same as you, Neil, just differently. That's the reason for me and you to exist as different entities. Not ultimately different, but as branches of the same tree.

[panoramix]

Thanks for the post neil, you gave me an smile today...
It reminds me some tibetan stories about masters and disciples... as example that of Naropa and Tilopa....

[justwannabe]

thanks for your post brother hubert, may we all continue on the path with faith, diligence, love, light, and joy.
We are from the divine, whether we see it or not. One day may we all rest in the hands of God
with love
brother neil

[Hubert]

God is laughter.

[AnahataAnanda]

i ABSOLUTELY love this!!! thank you for that!

[Jim Colyer]

Enlightenment is wanting only to be happy and successful.